It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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