Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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