she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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