I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
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Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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