You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
