Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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