Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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