She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
27 Times The Kardashian-Jenner Clan Absolutely Slayed at NYFW
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
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Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway