where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
