i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
