"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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