At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....