He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
