Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize