i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
