And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.