It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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