Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
