this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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