Define "chronic" masturbator.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.