dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
