Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize