They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Randomize
