suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize