I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
