Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
You brought string cheese to the strip club
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
