why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize