Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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