I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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