I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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