then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
