a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Randomize
