I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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