I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
