Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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