i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
