Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
