We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize
