I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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