Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize