youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
