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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.

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• (516): View more from New York

  If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."

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  19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I checked into jail on foursquare

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• (862): View more from New Jersey

  this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...

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• (705): View more from Ontario

  Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.

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  The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.

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