i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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