is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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