her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
