I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize