you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize