So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
