i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
