Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
